Why I want to try for another baby…
There was a time when nobody would be surprised to hear that I wanted another baby or that I was pregnant again, which for the record I am not at the moment. But after having two losses back to back I feel like there are a lot of people who wouldn't understand me wanting to get pregnant again. Everyone has different views and I would love to share mine on this subject with anyone who may wonder Why would she want to try for another baby? or maybe you are someone who thinks like me and likes to see that there are others that feel like that too!
Reasons why others would think we shouldn’t have another baby:
*1. We already have 6 kids, who needs more?
*2. We lost two babies last year…why put ourselves through the chance of another loss?
*3. Our youngest is 3, out of diapers, and getting more independent, why would we want to go back to the baby stage when things are getting “easier”?
*4. Why would I want to put my body through a 9th pregnancy?
Reasons why I DO want to have another baby:
*1. Yes, we already have 6 kids, and I love it! I love having a big family, I love how each one has their own unique personality, I can’t imagine not having a single one of them and it’s really cool to think that God might have another new little person that belongs in our family.
*2. That’s a hard one, because I was pregnant twice last year that was two different times of us imagining our family with another one. Two periods of time where I dreamed of what our baby would add to our family, and just because we lost those babies doesn't mean that dreaming of another just went away. I still feel like we are missing someone. And, if I am being honest, I would really really love to not end my childbearing years with loss (I know that is ultimately out of my control) it’s just that when you have such a traumatic experience (read more about it that experience here) it can really taint all your feelings on pregnancy/babies, and I really want that optimism back that I had before. (maybe that’s not a good enough reason, but that’s how I feel)
Also, I know there is no guarantee that we won’t lose another…I know this…oh how I know this…BUT I am letting my faith be bigger than my fear.
*3. There was a time when we had 3 of our kids 2 1/2 and under. There was a time when 5 of them were 5 and under. So, when you look at it that way then the thought of just having one baby and the rest of the kids being bigger seems almost too easy! :) I am sort of joking…trust me, I know how much work a baby is…but having just one that would need a crib, diapers, stroller, etc instead of couple at once would be a big difference.
*4. I loved being pregnant…there is just something so magical, so special about it. Even all the morning sickness, feeling like crap, throwing up, constant state of exhaustion, just reminded me that there was a little baby growing inside and it made me so thankful. I know all the pregnancies have taken a toll on my body, inside and out, but it has all been worth it. Even the babies we lost, even the awful, awful morning sickness I had with Trey and then lost him, still, I don’t wish that he never existed. I am thankful for that time I had with him inside me and how much I felt pregnant. Each pregnancy is different and precious in its own way, no matter how many you've had.
So there ya go, my reasons why I would be so excited to have the opportunity to be pregnant again. I have seen my doctor recently and she doesn't see any reason why we wouldn’t be able to go on to have a healthy baby even after our losses. She did a bunch of blood work, which all came back normal, and I talked to her about another test (that she doesn't feel like I need done, but one that a friend has suggested to me after her losses) so she has referred me to the maternal fetal medicine office (high risk doctor) to discuss with them if anymore testing should be done.
In the past we have always gotten pregnant so easily, we have never really had to try…I hate how that sounds now…there are so many couples that struggle with infertility that it doesn't seem fair that others get pregnant without thinking about it, or even while preventing. I use to take for granted how easy it happened for us. But after going through several months now of it not happening for us, I am more thankful for all those times when we got pregnant so easily, and I have more of a empathetic heart for those whom it doesn't happen for so easily/quickly. Always lessons to be learned.
Only God knows what the future has in store for our family….I will keep my readers posted:)
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